Thursday, October 16, 2008

y am i depressed?



i guess i should list out the numerous reasons for which i am depressed? its better to list out, then i will able to sort them out according to the their level of importance. ( giggling ...)
  • my holidays got over too soon.( common 1 week leave is short i feel)
  • i felt sad for the 1st time, leaving my old destination ( which i had taken for granted a times)
  • decision to leave my job and search for a better job (stay back to my old destination)
  • should i go for higher studies??? (a matter of confusion or dilemma and it haunts me!!!)
  • how to get a good job with a lovely pay package?( which i would like to show off to my family)
  • Fear of being jobless again ( u know, i have being through the phase where i was jobless for almost 1 year and its not easy , mark my words!)
  • I am never content with what i have, always found the other-side greener!
  • now i wanna become an nri again (its a tough decision and well india is not making me happy anymore)
  • moving to Mumbai is 1 solution( but still i will loose my independence, you see my relatives don't let me move out of their sight)
  • Still single!! sometimes it hurts ( when you see a lovey dovey couple....i hope you can understand)
  • To add to all, i saw my ex-crush snaps with a gal ( i know, i shouldn't affect me at all, but it does break your heart, at least my heart!!!)
  • my stupid HR is coming over to the office for the next 3 months, so no more blogging, orkuting and chatting ( which has become a major pastime for me and my frnd)
  • wana cry my heart out but it feels stupid to do that ( cos crying makes u weak and it wont end my problems too)
  • make a decision....this all seems crazy but in the end, i need to make the decision and the consequences stops me from doing that
  • I have turned into 1 weirdo, i say so, other day, i saw my old classmate in the mall, but instead of immediatly waving "hi" to her, i went into the opposite direction and was hoping that she doesnt recognize me. I did so, cos i was not in the mood of interacting and pretending that i was glad to meet her( not that i have any grudge against her) but just didnt wana interact! ( yes u must b thinking...i am 1 weirdo but couldnt help!!!)
( i think this is the most ridiculous idea of writing down why you're depressed?) well i have turned into 1 weirdo...you see i didnt even inform my frnd abt me leaving the old destination. i know its rude. but i was too pre-occupied with myself.....

I guess this sums up all the reasons, i dont wana lenghten the post as it will sound more depressing!

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