Showing posts with label scared. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scared. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Poochie - my stuffed doggie

Once I had a stuffed doggie which I fondly called as "Poochie". It had a mixture of golden and white furs. It was very soft and plump to hold. It had round eyes like a black button and red tongue hanging out his mouth as though waiting to be fed. I use to cuddle with it all night and speak to him in day time whenever I felt sad. It gave solace even with its silence and cute face. Some days I wished, it could speak to me or may be by some miracle, it could start wagging his tail.

One night, it so happened, that I had a terrible dream, where in full slab of tiles had fallen over my face and I had being severely injured and I cried out in pain and woke up every one around me.Then I realised that it was only a dream and every one went back to sleep. It started thundering and raining heavily. There were loud sounds of trees falling down. Then I saw Poochie  lying around me and strangely it looked like as though it was possessed. I felt his eyes shine in the dark and it scared the hell out of me. I saw his tail move for one moment. It looked like that it was going to start talking to me but before it could do such a thing, I managed to keep it out of my sight. I don't know if it was my imagination or it really happened but it spooked me out. I couldn’t sleep that night nor could I hold Poochie that night or any future nights. I covered myself fully with my blanket, even though I couldn’t breathe properly within the blanket, I didn’t dare to peep through it. I continuously twisted and turned in my bed to get sleep and desperately waited for the morning to arrive.

Somehow the long night got over and  sunlight appeared. I was scared to touch Poochie in the day light. I didn’t even have the guts to look at its eyes. With great determination and taking all the possible god's names, I lifted and packed Poochie  inside one suitcase so that it could never scare me again. Sometimes, we have to be careful of what wish we make, cos you never know it might actually come true in any form.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Decision and confusion time




it feels like a month is over since i blogged, but i think i jst blogged on diwali for the sake of blogging. Recently i have been out of topics.So didnt know what to post, and i didnt want to create one more meaningless post (already 2 meaningless post have been done by moi). so i didnt want to do that again.now a days i only read other peoples blog and was thinking what to write for my blog. so other day i and my frnd venus were thinking that we would cut paste email forwards which we recieve as it has meaningful and funny messages. ( too lazy to write on any topic)


Now dont get irritated if u find this post also meaningless. Let me begin for now, a lot has been happening in my life, never assumed that things would change so soon. No no i am not geting married, its just i am going to shift to a new destination this time which i have always wanted to shift to but i fear the outcome of it, so there is still a confusion on that matter.


Shifting means i would require to leave my JOB, and my only fear right now is that if in the new destination i would get a job or not. These fear of being jobless haunts me (cos i have being jobless for almost 1 year), so i know how it is, sitting at home and thinking how other unintelligent people (morons) are getting jobs and WHY am I not getting a job?????
But shifting also meanns, change of my dentist, which would also be a big thing as i am undergoing a treatment.


Starting a whole new life in a whole new city, is going to be tremondous learning and it requires patience and sometimes you end up comparing both the cities( ur ex-city and your new city) and then you start regretting.All this requires a decision and then wait for the result...tada...it either flops or success. if it is a success, then you are all happy and extremely happy BUT if at all it FLops, then gone, then there is no end of regretting and being sad and upset and asking GOD "WHY ME?".... so being insatiable....im turning the tables this time again....cos anywyas life doesnt comes with guarantees, so until i take risks, i wont feel LIFE....so enjoying every moment of this decision making process.....fingers crossed..hoping for the best :) and i am sure my life will change in the coming months...only i dont know if its for the good or for the bad.....yes im trying to be optimistic but my nature doesnt allow me, so full scared....lets see what happens in the coming days.........fingers crossed still